it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
This house was built for laser tag.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize