just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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