is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
