he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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