So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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