rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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