i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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