Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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