Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything

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(706): View more from Georgia

the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.

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(512): View more from Texas

I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.

(573): View more from Missouri

Successful day.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.

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(505): View more from New Mexico

I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea

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(740): View more from Ohio

He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"

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(914): View more from New York

I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.

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(541): View more from Oregon

Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!

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(218): View more from Minnesota

Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.

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