420 ftw
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
time to smoke my breakfast
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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