After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize