Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
Randomize
