Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
