Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
