YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize
