We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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