Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
