So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
