ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Randomize
