dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
I just sucked dick on a ferry
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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