I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize