No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Randomize
