what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I have aggressive nipples.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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