Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize