Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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