you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
