At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
