I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Randomize
