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Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
