we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Randomize
