you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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