were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
