Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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