I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
