I wish I could punch you in the face.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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