what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
