He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
