Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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