I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
and she was petting her beer can
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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