ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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