He is such a slut. More and more my type.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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