like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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