i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
