No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
