Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
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