i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
