Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
