He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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