question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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