don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize