Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Randomize
