nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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