I hope mine doesn't look like that
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize